Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize