She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
