...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
