I bet he comes in French.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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