Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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