just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
