OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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