Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
