Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
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Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
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You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.