i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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