I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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