I heard we made out
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize