it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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