Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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