Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
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THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
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Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
His nipple licking is glorious
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