I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize