I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
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