oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
