no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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