Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
