marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize