what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize