as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Help me help you realize you are a moron
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
