Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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