I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
