If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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