I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
