He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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