so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
