how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
