It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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