You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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