flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Im part way to drunk.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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