no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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