The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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