Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(646): View more from New York

maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.

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(646): maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick. http://tfl.nu/wm19

Replies (9) Good night (619) Bad night (4151)
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(913): View more from Kansas

Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl

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(913): Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl http://tfl.nu/6ay2

Replies (6) Good night (715) Bad night (2783)
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(801): View more from Utah

I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.

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(801): I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion. http://tfl.nu/ntse

Replies (28) Good night (11071) Bad night (1377)
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(256): View more from Alabama

this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?

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(256): this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo? http://tfl.nu/pp0d

Replies (3) Good night (2043) Bad night (653)
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(314): View more from Missouri

don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.

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(314): don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again. http://tfl.nu/ygo4

Replies (19) Good night (920) Bad night (4444)
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(734): View more from Michigan

So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.

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(734): So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot. http://tfl.nu/gct9

Replies (3) Good night (851) Bad night (782)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.

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(617): he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes. http://tfl.nu/atub

Replies (9) Good night (548) Bad night (2488)
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(210): View more from Texas

the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.

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(210): the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body. http://tfl.nu/1j67

Replies (6) Good night (1798) Bad night (495)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me

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(504): i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me http://tfl.nu/qsky

Replies (9) Good night (2159) Bad night (620)
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(240): View more from Maryland

Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.

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(240): Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum. http://tfl.nu/4chd

Replies (12) Good night (477) Bad night (933)
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(312): View more from Illinois

If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.

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(312): If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes. http://tfl.nu/vx4i

Replies (4) Good night (1110) Bad night (375)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"

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(612): Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here" http://tfl.nu/wz3j

Replies (1) Good night (1314) Bad night (328)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.

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(651): Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year. http://tfl.nu/7b82

Replies (2) Good night (449) Bad night (275)
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(810): View more from Michigan

I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.

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(810): I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point. http://tfl.nu/wk8l

Replies (1) Good night (1106) Bad night (240)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman

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(630): I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman http://tfl.nu/cwps

Replies (3) Good night (418) Bad night (390)

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