There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
