she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I have aggressive nipples.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
