It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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