If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
too bad you live with your parents still
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
