Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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