He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
