I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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