I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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