We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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