Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
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He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.