You're my little dorito
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
