She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
