Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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