He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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